A Guide to European Bathrooms

It might seem like a personal thing to blog about, but trust me, bathrooms are important. They are especially important when one realizes that most public bathrooms in Europe require you to pay money to use them.

I travelled to 11 countries last summer, and encountered pretty much every type of bathroom imaginable. Here are some of the highlights:

The Pull Chain: This type of bathroom was the most common in England. It was basically what it sounds like... a regular toilet with a pull chain to flush. Not very scary, but weird the first time.

The Pod: These you will find in most countries. Some are much cleaner than others, but I would recommend this only as a last resort. Some pods are located on the street, usually outside of a public park or square. Others – like the one I am still trying to forget in Rome – are located inside subway stations.

The interesting thing about a pod is that it cleans itself after a person exits. Water covers every single surface, sanitizing the entire interior for the next person. While this sounds good in theory, everything is usually left wet. The floor, the seat, and even the toilet paper... if there is any. If it’s a desperate situation, go ahead, but otherwise, I would hold it. Indefinitely, if necessary.

The pod bathroom. This one is in Paris, but they're found all over Europe.

The German Deathtrap: In Germany, I discovered the most high-tech bathrooms I have ever seen. You have to pay, like everywhere, and only a 50 Euro cent coin is accepted. There are two turnstiles, similar to the ones you would see at a subway station. You put the coin into a slot, and a ticket comes out. You then put the ticket into a second slot, and the turnstile is movable. On the way out, you put the same ticket into another slot, and the turnstile moves the other way. Simple, yes?

Unfortunately, I somehow managed to lose my ticket in the bathroom, and couldn’t get out. I ended up ducking under the turnstile, and the barrage of people yelling angrily in German taught me that people just don’t do that. If no one is around, by all means, duck under. We did this in Dresden. But, if other people are present, just pay the money. We want Europeans to like us.

The Squat Toilet: We encountered these mostly in France, believe it or not, but I hear they are all over Europe. There are two footprint markers, one on either side of the hole in the floor, that mark where you are supposed to put your feet. This type of bathroom is definitely not for the squeamish, but it’s not so bad... as long as you have good balance!

The Modified Squat Toilet: This is what they do in Italy. It is still a toilet, but the seat has been removed. What the hell is the point of that? It’s basically just a glorified hole in the floor.

It was also in Italy that I experienced my first co-ed bathroom. My friend Steve and I were both having a serious emergency in Venice – as a result of too much Pinot Grigio – and asked a waiter is we could please use the facilities in his restaurant. He said yes, which is very surprising, and we hauled ass to the back. Then, to our dismay, we discovered one stall and one urinal in the same room. Steve is married, and far too polite to share a bathroom with me, so I got to go first.

When I emerged from the stall, the waiter from the restaurant was waiting for me. In the bathroom. Needless to say, that was the last time I used co-ed facilities in Europe.

The Wall: My brother encountered this is Austria. He needed to find the bathroom, and a man directed him towards the “pissoire,” as it was so eloquently labelled in English. What my brother found was literally a wall behind the women’s bathroom.

There are a few other important things I must point out regarding bathrooms before I can completely end this blog entry. They are as follows:

Toilet paper: It will always be hit and miss. Some bathrooms will have it, and some won’t. To be safe, I carried around a portable pack of Kleenex wherever I went. This came in handy repeatedly, and you will forever be someone’s hero if you have bathroom tissue when they have none. Also, a bottle of hand sanitizer is a good idea, especially if you are dealing with a pod or hole in the floor.

Universal lingo: Don’t call it a “bathroom” or “washroom” like we do here in Canada. Some people might understand you, but the majority will not. WC, or water closet, is the most commonly used expression throughout Europe. You can try to learn how to say it in different languages, but almost everyone will understand the phrase WC.

The wonder that is a free bathroom: Hotel rooms, museums, and restaurants are your best opportunities to find decent bathroom facilities. You must pay to use these amenities, so you might as well get your money’s worth. If you are looking for a free bathroom on the streets - which is very rare, I assure you – try a North American chain. In Prague, Jeff and I found a free bathroom in Starbucks. In Berlin, we found one inside a Dunkin Donuts.

Find a North American chain. It will save you a bit of money!

Bathroom attendants: Sometimes there is a person (usually a woman), standing or sitting outside the bathroom door. Sometimes they are inside, handing out towels, and other times they are simply staring at you sourly. No matter what the case is, this person is the bathroom attendant. Whether you like it or not, you have to give this person a tip. It can be pennies, or it can be a Euro, but do it.

Always have a 50 Euro cent coin handy: This is currently the standard cost of bathrooms in Europe. Most will take a combination of coins, but for some – like the ones in Germany – you need exact change. Also, if you hand a bathroom attendant a 1 Euro coin, don’t expect change.

I hope that this information will be helpful to someone in the future. If not, I hope it was entertaining. Living in Canada, I took for granted things like free bathrooms. I never will again, and I think I might actually be a bit traumatized.

Images taken from Google.